Friday, Andy Ebon of Wedding Marketing Blog was talking about relationship marketing. So, I decided to share my thoughts about it. Of course, as a wedding professional you’ve heard that term before. It’s all over the marketing blogs on the net and the subject of about a gazillion business books. Sometimes it’s called the ‘know, like, and trust’ thing. The official definition is:
Definitions of Relationship Marketing
- Relationship marketing is a form of marketing developed from direct response marketing campaigns conducted in the 1970s and 1980s which emphasizes …
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Relationship_marketing - Relationship marketing refers to the benefits that ongoing relationships with key customers can bring to an organization.
www.acethecase.com/site/1438552/page/875389 - is an approach that focuses on developing a series of transactions with consumers.
wps.prenhall.com/wps/media/objects/213/218150/glossary.html - The overt attempt of exchange partners to build a long-term relationship and association in marketing.
ecommerce.etsu.edu/Glossary.htm - a marketing methodology by which a business establishes a relationship with their customers and stakeholders in order to foster customer loyalty and purchases over time
www.cecausa.com/general_marketing_glossary.htm
Wow, I feel all warm and fuzzy after reading that, don’t you. NOT Sounds so cut and dry. Where is the relating part of the relationship, huh? There aren’t any defining characteristics mentioned except long. No wonder people resist relationship marketing. It feels nebulous- like once you start you never know what might happen. You begin to imagine things like awkward conversations that would normally be tmi (too much information). Long pauses where no one knows what to say next. It doesn’t seem pretty. And, honestly, I wasn’t too keen on doing any of this until I found a way to make it my own.
New Ways of Relating
in my experience as someone who coaches wedding business owners on communication and relationship, I’ve found that there are two sticking points that prevent most wedding pros from really taking advantage of the benefits of relationship marketing.
First, the word relationship freaks people out. LOL You know how to have relationships in other contexts like with your family or spouse. There’s a certain loving way that you respond and react to their thoughts, cares and concerns. You’re probably just as comfortable with the conventional model of business relationships. Hierarchical. Nothing too personal. Based on reciprocity. You knew how to have a conversation before this web of digital stickiness getting in your way. I was thrown until I realized the answer.
Second, lots of folks don’t know what to say or do in this kind of business relationship. I bet this new, more authentic transparent style of business today throws most folks for a loop. For some it must feel weird or inappropriate, to connect deeply with clients. After all, it’s business for goodness sake!
Make Relationship Marketing Your Own
What I realized that might help you is that relationships are one in the same when you get right down to the bottom of them. Good relationships require attention, thoughtfulness and commitment. I mean, wouldn’t you treat your bride with less care, respect and support than you’d give to your best friend or your sister. Of course, you wouldn’t, and yet, you probably don’t tell your bride how much she means to you either. Why? Fear of looking foolish, naive, silly. What a shame.
If you can bust through fear of the unknown, which is the hardest part, you can begin to experience a renewed sense of satisfaction at work. To quote President Clinton- it’s the people, silly. That’s what you love.
Get closer to your people. Listen to them. Ask questions about the tough stuff. Commiserate. Help when you can. Little by little you’ll define the boundaries of the relationship. And, when you get stuck or something goes wrong (because that always happens), don’t pretend to have an answer if you don’t. Playing cool or taking a tough stance is a delay tactic that prevents you from mending things and moving on. It’s not a sign of weakness to say when you’re hurt, angry, disappointed. (nor is apologizing a sign of weakness.) That kind of honesty is the highest form of trust.
So if we enter into a business relationship, and I surely hope we do soon 
, know that I’ll be thinking about you. Caring about your thoughts and business. Keeping my eye out for things you might like or need. And, I’m here for you and when I can’t be, you’ll know.
Do you think differently about your work relationships than your personal ones? Why?
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Dina, this principle is the very core of my business. It’s all about the people and the relationships we cultivate with our clients and wedding partners (I hate the word vendor).
Without the relationships, we all might as well be drones that “does the job”. What fun is that?
Thanks for a great post!
Best,
Heather
Heather, you put your finger on something that had been troubling me- the word vendor. It feels very ‘arms-length’ to me. I like you idea of partners, which is closer to the truth, but must bow to the SEO g-ds and continue to use vendor.
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