On Tuesday I had the pleasure of attending the annual meeting for the Boston Wedding Group at the Harvard Club, a venue I adore.  Wedding pros know how to kick back and have a good time, let me tell you. The evening started with the beautiful name badge that was designed by Ellen of Table Artistry, who is the president of the Boston Wedding Group.

I so enjoyed chatting with Kelly of Artistic Blossoms and her lovely daughter, Camille, who often helps with her mom’s floral business.  (My girlie is helping me with GlamaShoot! until she returns to college)  We all share being ‘vertically challenged’ but take different approaches to solving it.  (They rock heels, while I go for an optical illusion- my personality seems 6 ft tall!)

Seeing old friends like Bo Winiker of Winiker Ochestras,  Alexis of  Alexis of  Weddings by Alexis and Meg Mahler of Custom Catering by Domenic & Anthony was a treat.  Did you know that Bo’s 3 piece plays Katy Perry’s California Girls- too wild!   I had a hoot meeting new friend Gene of Roots Catered Events- he tried to convince me Lady Gaga was better than Madonna- no way   Kelli of A Deux Bridal and I chatted about the importance of a good looking head- I’m sporting a super short look now- along with her bridal paper business.   Massachusetts has one of the best wedding communities and friends like Edna, Joy and Felice prove that.

After enjoying a lush reception that included yummy oysters (my addiction), beef tenderloin and lush tuna, we all gathered to hear Sonny Ganguly of Wedding Wire speak.  And, waited and waited.  His flight was delayed but when he arrived he thrilled us all with an excellent talk that emphasized the importance of finding your bride online and on the phone in the near future.  He says mobile is the way to go…  I’m working on an iPhone app right now!

So what’s my find?  Besides all these lovely wedding vendors, I especially liked PhotoBoothfavors by Nanette Kenney.   Her booth is formed by large curtains unlike some of the photobooths in town that try to squish you in there.   Her booth would add a very fun element to a wedding, especially one where there is a curvy bride or plus size members of the party.  Wish I could show you the pictures…I’m grinning ear to ear.

Have a wonderful weekend!

PS Next week, my hubby and I are escaping to the Berkshires for a few days of R&R&R  – the third R is Relocation Planning!  Working on my dreams, are you?

Today, I’m thrilled to have Ann Campeau, the co-founder of Strut, the Southwest’s only bridal salon that pampers plus size brides as my guest blogger.  I so agree with her that ‘curves must be celebrated’ and love that she’s devoted to what I call Luscious Ladies so much that she features samples in sizes 16-32.  Her tips will help you better connect to this bride and make a referral source for life!  ( the average woman is 5′4 and weights about 163 pounds, according to a survey conducted by the National Center for Health Statistics)  Take it away, Ann!

I finally remembered the story about the chicken and the pig.  It’s an analogy that really hits home for me when thinking about my wedding business because it answer the question:

Are you interested or committed to your growth and success?

Interested vs Committed

So, here’s how I remember the story, and if you heard a different one, please let me know.  Anyway, it goes like this.  The farmer decides he wants bacon and eggs for breakfast.  The hen who provides the fresh eggs is interested in his project.  The pig who gave his life to supply the bacon, well, he’s committed to it!

The hen did what was convenient for her.  Laying eggs is well within her comfort zone.  She didn’t step out on faith or see herself as belonging to a larger cause she wanted to support.  I see a lot of wedding pros and other business owners who are hens.  Doing what feels comfortable and wondering why not much as changed.

The pig was committed.  He stepped out on faith and gave his life for something he believed in.  He was fully invested in making the change and did whatever was necessary to make the project happen. To my mind, the pig is the real winner.

Now, I’m not saying the pig had a choice or that you should risk your life literally or figurative.  What I am saying is: Figure out which you are and act according.

A Hobby or a Business

This came up because that phrase, interested vs committed, has been haunting me for a few weeks now.  I see it everywhere. And, it relates to what’s happening in my business and my life.

Last night my hubby and I had this great conversation about him building a second business that feeds his soul more.  A fab jazz musician who plays the vibraphone, my hubby is a vast resource of music, especially jazz knowledge.  Truly amazing.  I can’t imagine why he wouldn’t want to spend every day researching, discovering and talking about music, since it’s so clearly his passion.

However, while he wants to find a way to start an online business, he’s merely interested, not committed.  He’s toyed with setting up a blog, but feels stymied about how to monetize it.  So, he’s not pursing a blog. He’s not into social media, which could connect him with resources and potential readers. But he doesn’t see how it would help  him now, so he’s not trying it.  Clearly, he’s frustrated with his work life but won’t explore beyond what he knows.

Does that sound like you when it comes to your wedding business?

Your Wedding Business is Your Vehicle

This kind of hesitation is normal.  I go through it regularly.  What makes the difference, at least for me, is that I know the struggles can be defeated if I commit and act accordingly.  My business isn’t a hobby ( as I talked about in an earlier post).

It’s the vehicle that’s gonna take me to my desired lifestyle.  It’s my Tesla ( a super sexy electric sports car- sexy without the guilt!!) and I’m ready to steer it to drive to my next destination.

I’m committed.  That means I do what’s necessary to move forward to the next step, whether  or not I feel especially comfy or like it.   This week I’ll be tackling Quickbooks because I need to better track sales.  I hate QB and knowing the numbers, but  totally up for the pay-off – buying a country house in the Berkshires to totally renovate!

This mindset pays off, let me tell you.   Two years after becoming a divorced mom with two small kids I purchased my first home alone, a lovely Victorian brownstone with a huge yard for my kids to play in.  Gosh, I loved the foot-wide oak plank floors, massive 13 foot pocket doors and still miss having a fireplace in my bedroom on winter nights.  Being able to give the kids not only a house, but their own floor was amazing.  Mainly, I loved the fact the house was mine because I was committed to getting it.  Every day I did something that moved me closer, like it or not.

So, the next time you feel sad or frustrated that your business isn’t growing or you’re not earning what you deserve, ask yourself:  am I a chicken or a pig?

Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.  ~Robert Collier

PS Tell me in the comments- if your wedding biz were a car, which one would it be?

Ok, you’ve head me say it time and again- you must be part of social media. It’s no longer a ‘nice to do’ or ‘get around to it someday’. When you see the numbers in this video produced by Deming Hill, you’ll be flabbergasted. Really. (I’m not endorsing Deming- just wanted to share the video)

And, although the video has a hideous sound track (trance music people, really?), the information about consumer use of social media is undeniable. True, you might not be a B2B (business to business) vendor but the majority of wedding merchant referrals come from other vendors. That’s why there are so many wedding networking groups, right?

Watch the video. Then imagine how connecting locally via Twitter (TweetLocal), or having a geo-tagged Facebook ad, or using LinkedIn strategically could benefit your business. You know the old saying, Fish where the fish are at! That’s online and in social media folks.

Still trying to figure out Twitter?  No worries.  You can learn all about how to use Twitter, find twitter buddies and more in my audio,

Social Media for Wedding Pros- Twitter 101

Hey, thanks to everyone who came out to the NERC conference this Sunday.  What a friendly crowd and the information shared was phenomenal, if I do say so myself.

You know what it’s like when you return from business travel- there’s a ton to do.  So, today I’m sending you off to look at this small business loan program from Sam’s Club.  Yup, the home and office supplier.

Small Business Loans from Sam’s Club

If you’re a member of Sam’s Club and want to invest in your business, you’re in luck.  Sam’s Club partnered with the SBA and a lending firm to offer loans to startups and small businesses.  Isn’t that great?

What I especially love is that loan amount- $5-25K- is exactly the size loan that solopros like us need but often can’t get.  (Too small for a big bank; not big enough for a smaller bank).  You need to be a Sam’s Club member and you can actually apply online.  Very cool.

I’d take a minute to gather all the relevant info they might need- revenue numbers, credit card debt, family income- in advance, just to make things easier.  Hey, asking for a loan is still nerve-wrecking even if you’re doing it online.

Read more about the Sam’s Club Small Business Loan Program

Don’t wait to apply

This program is like manna from heaven for so many good reasons.

I’d love to see you go through the process of applying.  It can be a very enlightening process, especially if you don’t get the loan. It highlights places in your wedding business that need attention.  Not wonderful to hear, but so necessary if you’re serious about having a business not a hobby

And, if you get the cash, well woo hoo!  You have a chance to push your business to a new height if you invest the cash wisely. (Don’t know how to do that.  No worries!  I’ve got friends who can help you think about it)

Share your Success

Don’t keep me in suspense if you get a loan.  Do tell so we can all be inspired by you and your chutzpah!

A great big congratulations to Lois Pearce of Beautiful Occasions and Toni Delisi of Memorable Events for coordinating one fine Northeast Regional Conference this past Sunday.  It was a wonderful, intimate experience with around fifty wedding professionals gathered to meet, learn and grow their businesses.

What I Learned

To Create a Killer Press Kit

Because of  the ultra-stylish and nice, Stella Inserra of Simply Dazzling Events, my online press room will finally be completed-correctly!  I was stumped about what to include.

Now, I know that I can add my own press releases with the most current one first and that any event I participate in could be a release.  Like GlamaShoot!  Or like NERC ( guess there’s another item for my to-do list).  As someone who has been featured on one of the most popular wedding reality shows, Whose Wedding’, I know Stella knows her stuff!

To Baby My Website

Brian Lawrence of Local Traffic Builders is the nicest guy.  Not only did he forgive me for deleting his emails accidentally, he taught me how to embrace all the planning, upkeep and work that goes with a website by thinking of my dear Positively Wed as a baby and me as the parent.  I couldn’t resist that because I am a mother of two excellent kids.  What’s one more?

Brian is a wealth information about how to select your domain name, the importance of  local search, and how to solve the mystery of getting traffic.  His site is a marvelous example of what works and his blog is fun.

Like at most conferences the networking was in the hallway so I missed a speaker or two.  However, I’m looking forward to getting the conference materials in pdf form (no heavy lifting and positively green!) so I can read more.

What I Shared

Honored to be the kick-off speaker, I rocked the house (the lovely Stamford Hilton) with my presentation, Fearless Conversations: 7 Conversations Every Wedding Pro Must Master to Survive.   We discussed loads of new ideas like,

• Why your wedding business is like a Tesla
• How to deal with being offended- complexify  (you read that right; I said complexify- that’s my word!)
• Ways to be transparent and connect so your bride adores you

We had a ball.  Big thanks to Candy Cain of Cain Travel for volunteering to roleplay with me.  We got into this really interesting situation of what do you say to a couple who want to dis-invite his mom?

Believe it or not, there is a way to answer that is responsive, makes the bride feel comforted and helps her grow personally, while still putting the decision squarely back in her court.

Gosh, I wish we’d thought to video the session.  Next best thing, Candy and I are working on a series of how to deal with family issues, especially around interfaith and interracial couples.

If you want your family dynamics question answered, just join my Test Kitchen (send an email with your question in it) and I’ll add it to the list.  While I can’t answer every question individually, I’ll select the most universal ones for the series.

So you’re going to laugh when I tell you this. I laughed–-out loud. You know I think the universe is a  cheeky gal. And I love it when her lessons come with a little wink and nod. I got one of her jokes the other day and I want to share with you.

Talking with the Universe

One of the best lessons I ever learned was:

Listen when the universe whispers before she has to yell and smack you upside the head.

That little whisper, your intuition, is her way of helping you navigate the world.

The Universe is Friendly

If you enjoyed reading The Secret,  you know what I’m talking about. It’s about using your feelings and intuition to guide you to have the happiest life you can imagine.

I got smacked in the head a lot when I was a younger businesswoman because I was inexperienced I tended to listen more to others than myself.  I substituted her wisdom for my own.  Great to have mentors but ultimately you’re the boss of you, right?

One of the biggest reasons I created Positively Wed was to remind you (and me) that you own your business and it is your chariot to speed you to your desired lifestyle. Let me say that again because it’s an obvious yet very profound statement.

Own Your Wedding Business!

What does that mean?  To me, it means accepting responsibility for growing my business so it can create the lifestyle I always wanted.  Doing what I think is right, helpful, productive, not just meeting the expectations of others.   It means promising myself to do more than my best then keeping that promise- no matter what.

Moshe and I talked about motivation on our negotiation call (you can listen in here).   I like to pump myself up by dreaming about the life I’m creating.  Right now reading design magazines like Boston home and dwell and trolling real estate sites for that illusive perfect country property.

That glorious vision gives me the ummph I need to get  Positively Wed ready to support our move to western Mass,  building a lakeside family compound there and start traveling to food/music festivals more regularly.  I’ve always wanted a have a modern pre-fab set on a couple of acres in the woods. And, this business is gonna help me do that. (Savannah, although so dreamy, is off the relocation short list.  Sigh)

What would ‘owning your wedding business’ could mean to you?

What does ‘owning your wedding business’ look like in real life?  It looks like:

• finding and applying great resources to grow yourself personally and professionally
• Running your business by your own moral compass
• Trusting yourself to know the right answer or to find it
• Being courageous enough to step up even when you’re afraid
• Bringing your compassion and personality to work every day

Honestly, what holds most folks back, maybe even you, is the fear of being accountable to yourself. Which seems kinda crazy, right.  You’d never break a promise to a bride.  So, why can’t you make and keep a promise to yourself to do what you need to succeed?

I’m sooo with you

How did I get on this train of thought? I’m living it now.  I got stuck between my promise to myself to succeed and the latest marketing thing- making videos.

I love the concept of marketing with videos.  Being able to see and hear someone makes a huge difference in how you well you connect.   I spent a year on the road traveling around the country when I was an Ombuds so that the 60k employees I served could see and talk to me in person.  Capturing their trust and building rapport was too important to do it any other way.

Of course, I know why I should make a video, and found tools to help me be more skillful (try easyprompter.com- it’s great for remembering what to say),  but it really bothers me to watch my videos.  I was stuck, and frankly, miserable about it.

That is, until yesterday when the universe whispered.  And, I listened.  She reminded me I already had the answer.  My business, my way.  My way of doing business is playing to my strengths.  My biggest strength is my empathy and compassion for others. I am soooo with you.  Whatever comes up in your business, I’ve probably ‘been there and done that’ or I’m going through it now with you.

Once I remembered to use ‘my force’ (Use the force, Luke), the idea of making the video got a little more fun and doable.  A big dose of compassion for me.  I can find a way to get the immediacy and connection of video that represents Dina style!

This is a lot to take in.  Feel free to let it percolate for a bit.  You own your wedding business.  You make the rules.  You keep your promises to your brides and to yourself.

What’s the universe whispered in your ear that you’re ignoring?

Listen up before she gets out her can of whoop-a…

How do you create a sponsorship contract?  Or, a partnering agreement?  Or, hire someone as an independent contractor for your wedding business?  I got your back! Or, rather I should say that DocStoc has your document.  With over 23k documents at your disposal at very affordable prices, DocStoc means there’s no reason to re-invite the wheel to run a more efficient, profitable wedding business.

DocStoc- Docs for Small Businesses and Professionals

Maybe you noticed I’m on kinda of a tear about organizing your business.  Mine, too, of course.  As Positively Wed grows (big thanks!) I realize the more I can create routines and systems, the better the business grows.  It’s common sense.  A variation on the carpenter’s ‘Measure twice, cut once’ idea.   Efficiency in 3 simple steps:

1. Find the template you like
2. Alter it to include your values, ideas, terms
3. Save and use again and again and again

This works.  Clients  would marvel when after a great conversation I’d send them a very thorough, complete professional proposal in  30 minutes.  How’d I do that?  I had a stable of documents already customized so all I had to do was ‘cut and paste’. That’s why I love sharing tools like StockLayout and DocStoc.  They make your wedding business run smoother so you can get back to the fun stuff.

What could you find useful at DocStoc?  Uh, how about:

• Job Descriptions
• Sales Pipeline spreadsheet
• Independent contractor agreements
• Sponsorship package templates
• Website sponsor agreements
• Break-even analysis

Outsource What You Don’t Love

Your time is so precious.  Don’t waste it struggling to learn something you’ll use infrequently.  It’s crazy to spend hours on the web trying to research and learn all you can about hiring an intern when you can purchase a template that tells you  the clauses that need to be there.  Take the shortcut.  Use their Startup Document Resources to find what you need, just when you need it.

Having said that, none of these templates are a substitute for common sense.  Don’t just download and use.  Read the document and modify it for your needs.  And, don’t rely entirely on the quality.  If you have questions, reach out to a business lawyer for feedback.  You can usually find a reduced fee attorney through your local bar association.  An ounce of prevention, as my mom used to say.

PS:  I like this idea so much I’m considering creating a customized contract package- template and audio- for wedding pros to use.  Is that something you’d be interested in?

A year ago, I was learning about some marvelous wedding people.  New friends who are bold, heart-based entrepreneurs who view their businesses with love, but also a clear eye.  I’m introduce them to you to from time to time.

You already know how much I admire Michelle Loretta of Sage Wedding Pros She shares my perspective and approach on business- there’s a system for being a heart-based, passionate and powerful wedding entrepreneur without going broke or crazy.  She kinda feels like the ying to my yang, if you know what I mean.

Anyhoo- if you don’t have Michelle in your RSS feed, tsk, tsk.  She’s a must read, especially if you want to run a saner, more profitable business (Michelle runs several) or write a  winning business plan.

In fact, I’m campaigning hard, along with Kate Parker of mypkwedding.com, to have Michelle present her premier business planning seminar, The Simple Plan here in Boston (or nearby) If you’re a wedding pro in NE who would absolutely attend if this event, drop me an email and we’ll plot!

So, without further ado, please read this lovely bouquet of  business know-how & knowledge & inspiration from my friend, Michelle.

I love TED.   TED is a storehouse for inspiration, growth and knowledge in bite size pieces.  Time is one of the most scarcest resources, especially once you pat the ‘half way’ mark.  I choose to spend my time filling my mind with bigger thoughts and ideas and TED is where I go for a refill.

Your Wedding Business

Should Help You Be Happy

Here’s a brief 22 minute video I really want you to see.  It’s not about the wedding business.  It is about how to turn your wedding business into a vehicle for doing good and doing well in the world.

Chip Conley on measuring happiness

Your wedding business was created to serve brides and YOU.  It’s not one or the other- it’s both.   You have a need to move beyond survival and invest in creating an environment where you and your bride can experience the most happiness possible.  I’m not talking ‘I like my job’.  I’m talking ‘getting up in the middle of the night’ kinda love for your business.

It’s about being obvious about wanting connect and joy and translating that into a tangible benefit- read: more brides.  Because the more your brides who feel connected to you and to the joy you experience, truly, the more your business can grow in terms of actual income and deep satisfaction.  Don’t believe me?  94% of world leaders believe that intangibles like trust, connection, satisfaction are important for their growth.

What’s Your Gross Business Happiness, Wedding Pro?

Like Chip, I’m asking  you to reconsider your ideal of success.  What would it be like to measure the success of your business in happiness, not dollars?  Take your own personal business census with these questions:

1. How happy am I to spend my days the way I do?
2. I do like and respect those people with talk with?
3. Would I be satisfied with my life if I died tomorrow?

Pretty deep stuff so take your time answering.  It might take weeks of asking and reconsidering to get to your true answer, you know, the one that isn’t full of ’should-ofs and ought-tos’.

You’ll know it because you’ll feel both exhilarated and a bit puzzled at the same time.  At least I felt that way when I discovered that I’d rather spend my days talking to groups- love the many- instead of individuals.  I still like one-to-one coaching but realize I won’t be satisfied until I reach as many people as I can.

When I launched my tagline was: for wedding pros who want to fall back in love with their businesses.  I still like that idea and that message. Fall back in love with your wedding business by creating a new measure of joy and connection for your life and your business.

Ok, so what do you think about all this? What are the  joy indicators in your wedding business?